every family has its own story...

last week was another busy week... it had marked the end of a story... a life story of my grandpa... though wasn't really close to him since young, i could still feel a little sad to lose him... but nevermind, as long as he is happy up in the far far away land, i will be happy for him too...

The past one week has made me think alot... see alot... feel alot... sometime i just feel like putting down everything and live in a world of my own... just mi in it... i just wanna have peace, quiet moments... just like wat i am having now, alone in the study room when everyone is aslp... people think that i am really a loner... or even ask mi, "why u dun feel bored de meh?"... mayb this is just mi... away from this confusing world...

Fairy tales are always beautiful
So perfect that I fall into in
Reality is still reality
It is never so perfect

Dishearted, disappointed or saddened
Feelings that have filled my life
Too native, always looking for excuses
To bring myself out of the world I hate

Waken up to face the reality
To face the facts that can never be changed
The imperfect world that I am in
Nothing can be done

Forget about these things
Remember only wat you think is worth
Move forward at your own pace
A smile everyday makes life a better one.

just another start of my rubbish... afterall a family is a family, i cannot change anything... i can only take it... accept it... and hope for the best :)

*closed eyes to make wish* [secret ;P]
hopefully my wish will come true one day...

things change, people come and go... life goes on...

the impression is fading
or is my memory failing
sitting alone in the study room
without any memory of his look.

he was always quiet sitting in the living room
the wrinkles on his face makes him look old
never in my life have i seen his anger
though they always mention it

after the arrival of the unwelcome "enemy"
the wrinkles makes him look even older
days after days weeks after weeks months after months
he grew weaker and weaker

the simile on his face
to response to our greetings
the view of him from the back as he leaves
make him look smaller and smaller

so close yet so far
he carried me when i was a baby
but the feeling had faded
he was never closed to my heart

but he is still who he is
someone who is related to me
someone who doted me before
though for a short while.

hope he left with a happy heart
hope he left to a peaceful place
unlike life in the past
goodbye for last

relaxing... starting to read my novel...

sometimes things are not like wat u think
sometimes things are not in a way u want it to
sometimes things just seem to be in a mess
sometimes things are just like that

change it, change ur thinking
things might not be in a way u want it to
change to like them, enjoy them
mayb you will feel better

tidy it, tidy up ur tots
sit back and start thinking
it might not be the best way out
at least u tried, tried helping urself

unable to change it?
unable to tidy it?
then leave it
one day u might learn to accept it

nth much just trying out to type out wat's in my mind. i m not a person good at expressing myself but i like to start typing or writing rubbish whenever i have something in mind. recently started to watch "One Litre of Tears" again. haha... some old things, tissues is really the most neccessary thing to be around u. haha... people always say i bo liao, one show can watch n watch again without getting sick of it. to me, everytime u watch the same show, a new feeling i will get out of it. to me, show really shows me alot that i had experienced. mayb i am still childish, but i really learn alot from the different shows i watched. slowly, this has become my leisure activity le lo :) but this isn't a good leisure activity. haha.

stop here for now... pen down my tot soon

fine sat morning. Suddenly feeling bored...

Have been busy the past two weeks, helping out in a primary school, basically is just some cleaning up and packing of the maths room... did up catalogs and also stock taking... sound quite boring? haha... ok la... not that oso... actually it make me even more interested into going into the education line... working with children is still my ultimate chance.

looking at the teachers doing their work after lessons, or imagining lesson times... haha... guess there are still some interesting area i guess... i always think that teaching child who will score in exams give me a kind of satisfaction... but at this moment, this is not exactly the kind of satisfaction i want... helping a child who has problem with his/her study, get their interest of studying, helping them improve is the kind of thing i have always imagine... but nv have the chance to do it yet.

was sitting in the staff room doing my catalog the other day, kind of imagining wat things will be like if this is the kind of lifestyle that i will be going through... but haha... wasn't able to get any image... haha... now dun even know can pass my uni le ma... how to imagine the next stage of my life...

Results releasing next week... haiz... no eye to see lo... haiz... anyway that's all for my two weeks of holiday...

back for some updates.


over the weekend went out with my "chatterboxes". haha.. was a early birthday celebration for jia coz my dear gal b'dae fall on mothers' day. didn't know exactly wat to get for her... so bought her something to eat. haha... instead of getting a cake which she dun eat, we got her a herbal jelly "cake" haha... with this jelly, hope that ur b'dae will bring u a brand new start... hope that all the "dark and black" days of ur life will all be washed away as u eat the "cake". the days ahead of u will be as sweet as the honey. haha...


we met up at 11, took a train down to harbourfont. then we experienced the hotest sunshine of the day... imagine walk from harbourfont to sentosa in the noon! haha... that wat the three silly singaporeans did... haha... as we reach the merlion area, we decided to take a bus to Palawan Beach coz it is really too hot and we were hungry... haha... had our lunch in the food court near the beach. after lunch we went chatting(as usual) at the beach... haha... then we went to have ice cream... before heading for a shower...


We went to saski at the siloso beach for dinner before heading for the magical show, "Sound of the sea". this one is much better than the one i saw the other time i went with my family. after the show we went orchard partyworld for k. haha... booked the room from 10 to 6 which is the next morning... haha... the room was terribly cold... haha... three of us had no sweater... haha... in the end we left at about 545 to de-freeze ourselves before taking a cab home... haha... was a weekend filled with hot and cold.




vanessa and me.




me, vanessa and jia

more pics will be uploaded when i get them all...

haiz, grandpa admitted to hospital again... so no oversea trip for mi le... haha... nvm then... i shall enjoy holiday in singapore ba... though i m not that closed to him, i still hope that he will be feeling better soon. or at least less pain ba...

*sometimes things just not happening in the way u want it too...*

hasn't been updating my blog since mid of last year. (din noe that was like so long long ago le..) kind of busy i guess... really busy and also the updating mood wasn't there...

Last end year holiday was a "stay at home" kind of holiday. Too many happening during that holiday so din have much chances to actually go out with friends, especially sarah who was back during that time. very sad to say that. but nvm shall wait til the next time she returns. just hope that all the ones around me can stay healthy everyday.

Start of the year was the start of my busy sem. Final programming proj before i graduate (hopefully :). 5 other teammates were involved in this proj - 2 guys with 3 girls. For those 3 months, guess everyone of us were trying to do the best we can. though there are times when things got abit ma fan, we still managed to survive. Thanks to Mr Dinosaur! haha... guess the 3 months were his nightmare. haha... nvm la hor... nightmare over le... u can relax now le... haha...

now is already 3 May. happy birthday to u (u shld noe who u r la hor, mr chen) :) old le... go find a princess to be ur queen ba... haha...

good nite... i m gng to bed le... more updates when i have the updating feeling ba.. haha...